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MAUREEN CALLAHAN: Bad global news media! Stop chasing ‘Woko Ono’ Meghan and poor Harry

Never forget: Meghan Markle is Nelson Mandela’s second coming.

Albeit in a custom Louis Vuitton dress (one that mimicked Kate Middleton’s Earthshot look tiny), a $90,000 aquamarine ring, and a stubborn cluster of grievances and flimsy claims of racism that she’ll never, ever tire of dealing with. narrate.

Last night’s RFK human rights ceremony had it all: an outspoken liberal host who accidentally shot and killed his colleague, a young wife and mother, and has since claimed zero guilt; our host’s wife, a talentless, stage-five-clinger and fame-adjacent fraudster who still claims to be Hispanic despite being exposed as a privileged white Boston woman; the fading embers of America’s preeminent political dynasty, featuring Kerry Kennedy, the head of RFK Human Rights, a DUI defendant who whined and groaned after being acquitted of being treated differently—i.e., arrested, charged, and tried—because she was a Kennedy .

And, of course, our special guests and honorees: Harry and Meghan, who make a rare joint appearance just before their mean, raging Netflix documentary series — which itself seems to have an elastic relationship with facts — begins streaming.

What a night! What a collection of the best and brightest! What could Harry and Meghan, this happy and glittering couple, so committed to lofty causes like human rights, racial justice, and public tantrums laced with an ever-present soup of blackmail, teach us?

Even Alec Baldwin, our host referenced above, couldn’t believe that Harry and Meghan – normally so busy saving the world – were actually there.

“I couldn’t believe it,” he said on the red carpet. “Honestly, I couldn’t believe it.”

Yoko Ono and John Lennon on March 1, 1975

Now let’s pause and thank the evening’s true heroes, those frontline workers on the gala carpet – H&M’s beloved and hated media pack – who ask the tough questions. Like, “Do you put money before family, Harry?” What a rhetorical question. Of course he is! So does Meghan, aka Woko Ono!

Well Alec, that makes millions of us. Really, wouldn’t any decent person, knowing that they didn’t do anything close to the courageous fellow award winner Volodymyr Zelensky, politely decline such an honor? Or at least accept in absentia?

Not our Harry and Meghan. Of course, Harry told us that he suffers from PTSD (his Apple TV+ documentary), that “every time I [camera] click, every time I see a flash it takes me right back to his mother’s death, but here they were last night on the blue carpet at the gala, smiling for the cameras, Meghan turned to the lens like a blooming flower who turns to face the sun.

Meghan Markle is never more in her element than in front of the camera. But please, evil global news media, stop chasing Meghan and her poor, traumatized husband. Just let them continue their low profile work as content providers at Netflix, Spotify and Penguin Random House.

And won’t anyone please think of their children, especially the daughter they named after the late Queen, head of that insidiously racist family who didn’t care that a pregnant Meghan was suicidal?

Let’s also allow them to continue preaching about the environment, even though they flew privately to New York for this ceremony and were driven around in a luxury gas-guzzling SUV. Let’s listen carefully as they learn compassion and kindness as they tear down their respective families of origin. Let’s not wonder if Harry is motivated by money, even when we learned that King Charles reportedly told his dying mother that he was no longer taking Harry’s calls because “I’m not a bank.”

Let’s ignore the drum roll of claims that Meghan is a bully to work for. Let’s ignore the high-ranking staff who keep fleeing Harry and Meghan. And let’s definitely forget their mission statement when signing with Netflix.

“Our focus will be on creating content that informs but also gives hope,” they said. As parents themselves, they said that ‘creating inspiring family programs is also important to us.’

That’s one way to say it.

Anyway, back to Alec, who struggled to answer the next question: what did he find admirable about Harry and Meghan?

You would think this would be a slam dunk. After all, H&M were the guests of honor, seats at their table costing $250,000 each, sitting on stage in dialogue with DUI defendant Kerry. Surely Alec could cite a concrete, realistic example of Harry and Meghan’s work in advancing human rights?

Let's definitely forget about their mission statement when signing with Netflix.  “Our focus will be on creating content that informs but also gives hope,” they said.  As parents themselves, they said that 'creating inspiring family programs is also important to us.'  That's one way to say it.

Let’s definitely forget about their mission statement when signing with Netflix. “Our focus will be on creating content that informs but also gives hope,” they said. As parents themselves, they said that ‘creating inspiring family programs is also important to us.’ That’s one way to say it.

Even Alec Baldwin (riht), our host referenced above, couldn't believe that Harry and Meghan - normally so busy saving the world - were actually there.

Even Alec Baldwin (riht), our host referenced above, couldn’t believe that Harry and Meghan – normally so busy saving the world – were actually there.

Spoiler alert: he couldn’t.

After taking a moment to comprehend, Baldwin mentioned their “ability to deal with difficult circumstances in the press” – circumstances of their own making, but why get bogged down in details? – ‘without having too much trouble.’

In desperation, he turned to his fake Hispanic wife for help.

“Keep going and that’s inspiring,” Hilaria said. “You have to know who you are” – you couldn’t make this up – “and keep going there.”

Now let’s pause and thank the evening’s true heroes, those frontline workers on the gala carpet – H&M’s beloved and hated media pack – who ask the tough questions. Like:

“Do you put money before family, Harry?”

What a rhetorical question. Of course he is! So does Meghan, aka Woko Ono!

But as an indication of the media’s skepticism, this is telling. Oprah is nowhere to be seen. Whoopi Goldberg blasted Markle on air, and her “View” co-host Ana Navarro ripped into the Netflix trailer saying she was “tired of the sight” of those two whining and crying.

Nile Gardiner, Margaret Thatcher’s former assistant: “If there was an Academy Award for hubris, vanity and narcissism, Meghan and Harry would be the top contenders.”

Only Gayle King, who looks more pathetic at this point, a water carrier for these two youthful, spiteful brats, has defended the trailer and said we should all watch the series before passing judgement.

Our special guests and honorees: Harry and Meghan, who make a rare joint appearance just before their gallant, furious Netflix documentary series - which itself seems to have an elastic relationship with facts - begins streaming.

Our special guests and honorees: Harry and Meghan, who make a rare joint appearance just before their gallant, furious Netflix documentary series – which itself seems to have an elastic relationship with facts – begins streaming.

Meghan Markle's Spotify podcast Archetypes

Prince Harry's memoir 'Spare' is out January 10th, Penguin Random House

Please, evil global news media, stop chasing Meghan and her poor, traumatized husband. Just let them get on with their low profile work as content providers at Netflix, Spotify (left) and Penguin Random House (book cover, right).

It’s too late for that. The first trailer has over seven million views and generated over 400,000 dislikes versus just 22,000 likes.

Both Netflix trailers — a second that dropped on Monday, a day before the RFK gala — have been dissected and analyzed as if they were the Zapruder movie.

Guess what? Some of what’s inside has turned out to be fake, fake, fake.

The footage of paparazzi chasing Meghan is not real. We know one is still taken from a Harry Potter premiere that took place years before Harry and Meghan even met. Another was a media eye after disgraced Trump attorney Michael Cohen. Another hurdle covered British star Katie Price for a lawsuit.

But hey – Harry and Meghan would never let the truth get in the way of a good story, so why should their producers care?

Speaking of: If you want something closer to the truth, check out the alternate trailer of Harry and Meghan assembling a hitherto unknown hero.

Here we see footage of Meghan making her way in front of Harry on more than one occasion, from appearing to shame a royal courtier during the walkabout after the Queen died, from Meghan’s inspirational messages on bananas to sex workers (“you are loved”), from her ability to cry on command — “one tear, left eye” — and the icing on this sundae, South Africans are dancing in the streets, as Meghan claimed they did at her wedding to a prince.

Hey – no one said Harry and Meghan were telling the truth. Just their truth. And while it may still have a grip on their delusions, a bubble in which the rich and famous give each other completely undeserved accolades – to the rest of us, here in the real world?

We laugh. And we can justifiably thank Harry and Meghan for one thing: this incredible comic relief, however unintentional. It’s original. It’s hypocrisy and tone deafness at its best. It’s a lack of self-awareness that just keeps giving. If they want to call it charity, I’ll take it.

Source: Dailymail

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