I’m a single mother. A fellow parent who I thought was a friend reported me to social services for banning my kids from watching screens alone. But it was what happened next that truly terrified me…

Arriving home after a long day at work, I shouted ‘Hello’ to my three teenagers, who were all in the kitchen.

One was preparing dinner, another washing pots and pans, while the third was emptying the bins.

I kicked off my shoes and relaxed on the sofa as I waited to be called to the table, where I was served a delicious chicken stir-fry, complete with a rainbow of chopped vegetables.

Contrary to what you may be thinking, it wasn’t my birthday, Mother’s Day or any other special occasion, but a regular occurrence in our house, where my children have been responsible for domestic chores since they were toddlers.

Michael, 19, Christian, 17, and Heather, 15, have made their own beds and tidied their rooms since they were three, done laundry and cooked since they were seven and ironed and vacuumed since turning ten.

While I wholeheartedly believe my hardline approach has been the making of my children, others – including the parent who reported me to social services nine years ago – may disagree.

My crime, according to the snitch, was not allowing my children to watch TV, other than the two family films we’d view together each month.

Thankfully even the social workers thought it was a ludicrous complaint, though they still had to do a home visit and speak to the school, which was terrifying.

It goes to show how very indulgent modern parenting has become that limiting screen time could possibly be considered abuse.

But ensuring my children are pulling their weight, rather than wasting time lolling around watching YouTube, has always been part of my, apparently unfashionable, parenting philosophy.

I felt vindicated when I read the findings of a survey this week, in which 56 per cent of parents said their children refused to help around the house. It transpired that 43 per cent of teenagers have never vacuumed, a third have never hung up washing, and a quarter have never emptied a dishwasher or cleared away plates.

Frankly, I blame the 2,000 parents surveyed for having left it too late to enlist their children’s help with jobs that should, by teenage years, be second nature. They might feel they’re being loving by picking up and laundering their children’s smalls and slaving to create their favourite bolognese, but in fact they’re infantilising them, doing them no favours at all.

I have friends whose young adult kids sit holed up in their rooms, which are carpeted with dirty laundry.

I can hardly believe I know people with 30-year-olds still living at home who complain they still ‘do nothing to help’.

My response? ‘What do you expect when you’ve always done everything for them?’

It’s all so different from the domestic scene that greets me when I get home each night.

From the off, I’ve instilled a work ethic in my children, whose father died in 2017. They only need to look at me, a single mum holding down three jobs, to see how tough you have to be to meet life’s challenges.

I’ve never allowed them to stay home from school or sports matches with sniffles, and if they fail to pack the things they need, that’s on them. When Michael, then 14, forgot to pack his sleeping bag for a Scouts camping trip, I refused to go back for it even though it was due to be a freezing night.

It’s all helped them learn to be responsible – and happy. I strongly believe the high level of anxiety in teenagers these days is due to a lack of boundaries.

Doing chores from a young age has not only given my children confidence in their ability, but means they can see what needs doing without any micro-managing.

One of my jobs is working for a catering company, and the kids sometimes do shifts with me. When I see other young staff doing the bare minimum, I’m not surprised my three are so popular with the hiring team. Christian and Heather also stack shelves at the local Post Office, while Michael is training for a Civil Service role and saving to buy a one-bedroom flat, which he hopes to have a deposit for this year.

Of course I still sometimes have to nag, like when they don’t leave enough time to wash their breakfast dishes before leaving the house, but I wouldn’t dream of washing up for them.

Instead I’ll take a photo and send it to them, saying ‘I don’t want to be confronted by a full sink in the morning’.

Nowadays, there are certain chores they insist they’re better at than me, like DIY. So when Michael has a day off, I hand him a list of jobs, from hanging pictures to fixing drawers.

Both boys are also expert ironers, and all three even offer to do one another’s laundry.

Heather wanted a party in the summer and I said she couldn’t have people over while the garden was so overgrown. So, without even being asked, Michael and Christian blitzed it after finishing their A-levels and GCSEs and it looked fabulous.

Sharing the chores means that, although I work a lot, I don’t get burnt out like so many mothers who try to juggle it all.

We also have time to do things together as a family, such as playing board games, and my kids appreciate that.

While other mothers’ memories of the toddler years include clearing up endless toys, for me a stand-out moment was watching three-year-old Michael struggling to pull the duvet over his bed, having been told he was now old enough to make it himself.

You may think this sounds cruel, but looking at how capable and proactive my kids are now, I feel very proud of them and my parenting style.

AS TOLD TO HELEN CARROLL