I met my husband when I was 22 and he was 38 – but now I’m older, our love story gives me the ick

A woman has revealed how she is ‘starting to regret’ her ‘age gap marriage’, just two years after tying the knot.

The 27-year-old, who is believed to be from the US, took to Reddit to anonymously share that she has gotten ‘the ick’ from her 43-year-old partner and regrets marrying him.

They met when she was just 22 years old, and he was in his late 30s, although she said he acted much younger. 

The coupe wed when she was 25, and from the outside their relationship seemed great, with the woman describing their lifestyle as ‘pretty comfy’ and insisting they were in sync on many values and goals. 

However, she claimed now that her ‘frontal lobe is fully developed’ she has outgrown him and probably wouldn’t have picked him as a partner if they met at this age.  

At the heart of her unease is a growing resentment towards the circumstances under which the relationship began, saying the fact he pursued her when she was aged just 22 is an ‘ick’.  

The post read: ‘When I first met him and he came along and offered security, I jumped on it! I knew it was weird dating a guy so much older, but I’ve always had a rebellion-ish mindset.

‘I don’t know, I thought it was kinda hot, I blame Lana Del Rey and people in my life for not telling me it was a questionable relationship. We married when I was 25 and everything has been pretty alright on paper so I feel bad complaining.’

As a dual-income, no-kids couple, they have spent years building what she calls ‘a solid foundation together’.

She added: ‘We show affection to each other, though sometimes it feels like he’s just a roommate or a parental figure. Our sex life is boring and that’s also a big part of it.’

Financially, a divorce would mean giving up her current quality of life and she dreads the idea of returning to the dating pool. 

She added: ‘Anyways, even though I’d say our marriage is like, 80 per cent good and I feel a deep love for him, I also realise now that my frontal lobe is fully developed I’m growing out of this container of him making all the decisions. 

‘I probably wouldn’t chose him as a partner if I had met him now. Really the core of it all is that I’m carrying this resentful/ ick feeling that he pursued me when I was so young. 

‘So what if I was mature for my age? I couldn’t even imagine dating a 22-year-old now and I’m only 27.’

She later clarified: ‘The ick from the age gap didn’t come from social media, it came from me growing up and seeing relationship dynamics more clearly.’

The post, which racked up over 4,000 likes, saw a flurry of supportive commenters offering the woman some advice. 

One person said: ’27 is a really great age to start over. So is 28, so is 29 and so is 30. Who cares if you couldn’t live how and where you want, that’s kind of the beauty in messing it all up and getting to start again.’

Another said: ‘Can confirm. Even 43 and 48 are great ages to start again. I’ve done it and I’m 52 now. Never been happier in a relationship.

‘With every year you know yourself better and importantly, know what is and definitely isn’t okay for you in a relationship and partner. Don’t be held back by putting yourself in a box.

‘There’s a risk that resentment builds as your doubt floods your head and you see the evidence that the doubts are justified. Seriously consider what that looks like as a future and then decide for yourself if it’s jumping off time or if you’re having a wobble.

‘If you suppress your agency or sexual needs, you can pretty much guarantee that you’ll be resentful. Disaster and pain then become inevitable. The strangers on the internet can’t and shouldn’t decide for you.’

Another added: ‘My mom is starting over at 59 and she’s happier than I’ve ever seen her in my life! It’s never too late to choose yourself.’ 

A fourth added: ‘OP, 27 is when I got divorced from my 8-years-older ex (married at 20, he was 28). It’s unequivocally the BEST decision I’ve ever made. My life is mine, I’m so happy now (31).’