Relationship therapist reveals the biggest Valentine’s Day blunders to avoid… and which ones can land you in the hospital
It’s deemed the steamiest, most romantic night of the year, but Valentine’s Day isn’t always just fun and games.
Experts speaking with the Daily Mail have detailed the hidden risks of certain intimate activities along with the necessary precautions you should take to protect your health on this international day of love.
From allergic reactions to misuse of erectile dysfunction medicines, sex-related injuries are common.
Conclusive figures are scarce, but one 2021 survey estimated that 1,250 sex toy injuries send people to emergency departments nationwide each year.
Self-medicating with erectile dysfunction drugs can cause fatal blood pressure drops when mixed with heart medications, and it can mask critical early warning signs of heart disease or diabetes, delaying vital treatment. Other severe risks include priapism, a painful, tissue-damaging erection, and harmful interactions with other prescriptions.
Additionally, trying new sexual positions carries potential dangers and risks of injury if not approached with care. The most common include muscle strains or ligament sprains, particularly in the back, neck, hips and knees.
Awkward or overly ambitious positioning or practices can also lead to nerve compression or, in rare cases, more traumatic injuries like penile fracture or anal tearing.
And attempting complex or acrobatic positions without proper strength, flexibility or stability increases the risk of falls or impact injuries, while cheaply-made personal toys can irritate the skin and potentially cause long-term harm.
While an adventurous spirit can fuel intimacy, it should never come before open communication to ensure mutual enjoyment, enthusiastic consent and safety for everyone (stock image)
‘Try to make thoughtful choices around your sex life during Valentine’s [Day] and think both one and two times before trying something new that feels risky,’ Sofie Roos, a licensed sexologist and relationship therapist, told the Daily Mail.
Erectile Dysfunction drugs
For many men, performance anxiety in the bedroom can ruin intimate endeavors and strain a relationship.
Men without a prescription for ED medication may dip into a trusted friend’s supply in an effort to increase their endurance and performance, but this common practice is a major gamble.
Using sildenafil, marketed as Viagra, or tadalafil, marketed as Cialis, recreationally has a range of uncomfortable and disruptive mild side effects, even in otherwise healthy people. Common reactions include headaches, facial flushing, nasal congestion and indigestion or heartburn.
People may also experience dizziness, blurred vision, muscle aches or a blue tinge to their sight. These side effects stem from the drug’s mechanism of action, which is to systematically dilate blood vessels.
These are all side effects listed on prescription packets, but the danger multiplies significantly when taken without a prescription by someone without the diagnosed condition.
Viagra and Cialis primarily interfere with nitrate drugs, which treat chest pain by relaxing and widening blood vessels to improve blood flow and oxygen supply to the heart.
Together, these drugs can cause a dangerously exaggerated and unregulated drop in blood pressure, a condition known as profound hypotension. This can lead to dizziness, fainting, shock or even a heart attack or stroke, as the body is unable to maintain adequate blood flow to vital organs.
Even in healthy individuals, using drugs like Viagra (pictured) or Cialis without a prescription can cause a range of disruptive side effects
Anal intercourse
Anal intercourse, due to the anatomical and physiological differences of the anorectal region compared to the vagina, presents its own specific health risks.
Engaging in this activity without adequate preparation, lubrication and technique can lead to complications ranging in severity from minor to extreme.
‘Many injuries that happen during sex aren’t caused by what you do, but how you do it,’ Roos said. ‘The body needs time to adjust with new movements and types of stimulation, which is why good preparation, a calm tempo and plenty of lube is key to minimize the risk of friction related damages.’
The thin, non-lubricating tissue of the rectum is prone to tears, fissures and abrasions, which can be painful and create entry points for infection.
Most notably, these micro-tears significantly increase the risk of sexually transmitted infections (STIs), including HIV, chlamydia, gonorrhea and human papillomavirus (HPV), the virus linked to anal cancer.
In rare cases, severe trauma can lead to more serious complications like rectal perforation or damage to the anal sphincter muscles, potentially affecting bowel control.
These risks underscore the critical importance of safe practices. Key preventive measures include using an ample amount of water or silicone-based lubricant to reduce friction.
Trying new positions without proper preparation is risky (stock image)
‘Make sure to communicate around boundaries and preferences before to avoid sexual stress, stepping over the line and long term consequences,’ Roos said. ‘Also talk [to your partner(s)] about how you’d like to have foreplay, and communicate before moving on to the next step.’
Doctors also advise always using condoms to lower STI transmission, proceeding with gradual relaxation, communicating and ensuring thorough hygiene – particularly by never transferring anything from the anus to the vagina without washing it first.
Any persistent pain, bleeding or discomfort following anal activity warrants prompt medical attention.
New sex positions
‘While testing new advanced sex positions can be thrilling, it’s also easy to push it too far and risk getting hurt,’ Roos told the Daily Mail. ‘To wrongly put pressure on joints, back and nerves can lead to numbness, pain and in rare cases even nerve damage.’
Moving beyond familiar positions can spice up intimacy, but the bedroom is not a gym. Attempting complex or acrobatic sex positions without the requisite core strength, flexibility and stability makes the body vulnerable to injuries.
The most common are musculoskeletal – such as sudden strains in the lower back, a twisted knee or a painful neck crick resulting from awkward angles or unexpected slips. These positions can also put unusual pressure on nerves or joints, leading to pinched nerves or ligament sprains.
In rare but severe cases, overly ambitious maneuvering can result in traumatic injuries such as penile fracture or anal tearing.
‘To avoid it, make sure to not have shower sex, and to be in stable sex positions at solid ground,’ Roos said.
The key to safer exploration is gradual progression, open communication about comfort and an honest assessment of one’s physical limits.
Pushing physical limits during sex can lead to rare but serious traumatic injuries, including penile fracture or anal tearing (stock image)
Sex toys
If you’re looking to bring an accessory into the mix, whether solo or with a partner, the allure of selecting a new sex toy often overshadows any risks.
‘For sex toys, the main health risk is that you use a cheap model made out of a material that isn’t body safe [and] is favorable for bacteria growth,’ Roos told the Daily Mail.
Many affordable, jelly-like or plastic toys are made from porous materials like PVC or TPE, which cannot be fully sterilized, creating a hidden breeding ground for bacteria and mold that can lead to persistent infections or allergic reactions.
To achieve their soft texture, these materials are often stabilized with phthalates, or chemical plasticizers linked to endocrine disruption. The result is a product that may not only cause immediate irritation but could also introduce unknown long-term risks through intimate contact.
Opting for non-porous, body-safe materials like medical-grade silicone, glass or stainless steel is a fundamental precaution that prioritizes health over a bargain.
Roos also warned against sharing toys irresponsibly – ‘by not using a condom and not carefully washing it between swaps.’ She said this can increase the likelihood of spreading STIs, ‘a risk not many are aware of.’
She also warned about using sex toys incorrectly. ‘For example,’ she said, ‘using something without a big stop in the anal can lead to it getting stuck, which needs medical care – which is not the most fun way to spend Valentine’s [Day].’
Lubricants
While necessary in some instances, these topicals can also present dangers.
Personal lubricants can be rife with risky chemicals and additives, such as parabens, which can cause a skin infection on contact and are known endocrine disruptors.
The moisturizing agent glycerin can also disrupt the natural pH balance of the vagina, potentially leading to yeast infections or bacterial vaginosis.
Artificial or natural flavors, like citrus, mint or chocolate and perfumes are among the most common allergens. They can cause burning, itching and inflammation.
Adventurous spirit aside, nothing is more important than communicating to guarantee mutual enjoyment, clear consent and genuine safety for all.
