8 thrifty habits that are making you POORER: Therapist to A-listers and royalty reveals why being stingy with tips and hoarding old clothes is actually holding you back from making money

Do you earn a good salary, but there’s nothing left by the end of the month? Or is your wardrobe full of shoes you’ve never worn, but can’t bring yourself to throw out?

According to a world-renowned therapist, these are signs that you are suffering from a ‘scarcity’ mindset, which will hold you back from making the money you dream of.

In fact, Marisa Peer, from the UK, who has spent more than four decades working with Olympic athletes, A-list celebrities, royalty and top CEOs, said that your brain is actively working against you.

‘You can’t manifest wealth while holding onto scarcity habits and a scarcity mindset. The mind loves what’s familiar and works hard to avoid what’s unfamiliar,’ she said. 

Marisa, who is the author of a new book, Your Mind, Your Rules, added: ‘If money and success were scarce when you were growing up, your mind files them away as unfamiliar and then pushes them away when they finally show up.

‘That’s why the things we say we want so often slip through our fingers, whether it’s love, money, career success or weight loss.

‘You have to make the thing you want familiar to your mind first. Otherwise, it drifts straight back to the old, comfortable pattern, which is the one that it knows.’

Here is how to change your thinking from scarcity to abundance – and the eight daily habits that are blocking you from bumping up your bank balance…

You think money is a bad thing

If you feel unsure about making money, craving it on one hand and judging it on the other, you will stop yourself from accruing it.

‘The mind cannot hold conflicting beliefs – you completely block your brain,’ Marisa said. ‘Many people want to be wealthy and they long to be rich, but they say things like, “Look at those fat cats, they’re disgustingly rich, “or “I’d love money, but you won’t know who your friends are.”

‘What you’re saying is, “I want money, but money is bad.”‘

The reason statements like these have so much power is that the brain is designed to move towards what you require, but ‘if you link pleasure and pain to having money, that conflicting thought blocks your brain’. 

You have a ‘just in case’ mentality

Do you have cupboards full of old makeup and beauty products that you no longer use? And is your wardrobe packed with clothes that don’t fit you, are out of fashion and don’t suit your current lifestyle?

This is a ‘scarcity habit’ and one of the biggest issues on your money-making journey, Marisa said .

‘We often keep CDs or DVDs when we don’t have a CD or DVD player any more,’ she said. ‘Go through your house and look at your old stuff – toys, books, CDs and DVDs and old chargers. See how much you are holding on to things you don’t need and ask yourself, “Am I saving that in case it comes back into fashion or in case I might need it one day?”‘

Her advice? Start by not keeping old stuff. Don’t hold on to the old makeup, the old products, the old clothes – give them away. 

You talk too much about what you can’t afford

The simple act of saying ‘I can’t afford’ could be sabotaging your financial health.

‘If you say, “I don’t know where the money’s coming from,” or “I can’t find the money,” you’re telling your brain that you can’t have it and you never will,’ Marisa explained. 

‘Switch those statements to, “more money is coming” and “I will have that”, instead.’

Marisa used this technique herself as a cash-strapped solo mum. 

‘I was a single parent and I had no money at all, and I had to do this a lot – and it really worked. I understand it sounds confusing, because you don’t have money, but that’s the whole point,’ she added.

‘You mustn’t say “I don’t have money.” The brain is what I call a big proof-making robot. The more you say “I don’t have”, the more you prove it, and you live in lack. The more you say “I have”, the more you prove that instead.’ 

The big thing is to make your brain think about where you’re going – don’t stay where you are. Many people came from absolutely nothing and became massively successful because they had that wealth mindset. 

Marisa said, ‘They would always say where they were going, not where they are: “I am going there, I will have it, I am becoming wealthy.”‘ 

You are a stingy tipper

Even the smallest habits can give an insight into your true attitude to wealth, including how much you tip your waiter at a restaurant.

‘A lot of people who don’t have money are very mean about tipping,’ Marisa told the Daily Mail. ‘They hold their money so tightly they don’t want to part with it, and you have to stop that, because it blocks your brain.

‘Being a bad tipper reveals that you’re in a scarcity mindset.’

You don’t feel you deserve nice gifts

Do you feel uncomfortable when people give you nice presents or treat you to a meal?

‘I see this a lot – it’s the idea that, ‘I’m not worth it, I don’t deserve it,’ Marisa said.  ‘Imagine that somebody gave you a lovely gift, don’t say, “Gosh, you shouldn’t have spent the money on me, I don’t deserve that.”

‘You’re saying, “you shouldn’t have – don’t spend your money on me. Do the opposite.”

Instead, try saying, “Thank you for thinking of me, it’s so nice that you bought that for me.”‘

You’ve got lottery winner syndrome

It’s estimated that up to 75 per cent of lottery winners are bankrupt within three years, and Marisa said they all have something in common – the winners don’t feel they deserved the money.

‘If having money is unfamiliar to you, and investing it is something you’ve simply never done, your mind reverts to what it knows, which is spending until the money is gone,’ she explained.

‘If that was your pattern when you lived on a weekly wage, you’re going to repeat that with a large, frightening lump sum.

‘The money arrives, but the inner blueprint never changes. So the money leaves again.’

You keep talking about the present in the wrong way

You have to start talking about the things you want, can do and believe in, rather than the factors that could work against you or go wrong.

‘When you say, “I’m stony broke, I can never afford that, it’s out of reach,” your brain starts to prove it.

‘Instead, you need to say, “I’m becoming wealthy now. I’m attracting wealth now. I’m successful, and I’m making money right now.”

‘It sounds weird, but because your brain works in the “now” it can only action abundance when you say now as the brain is poor at future pacing.’

She points to Sean Connery, who had a picture of a gold Rolls-Royce on his bedroom door when he was living in a tenement in Scotland.

Marisa said: ‘Every day he said, “I’m having that gold Rolls-Royce, that’s my car.” He didn’t say, “In ten years I’ll be driving that car.”‘

Many people who are absolutely broke have had a picture on their bedroom wall, or in their wallet of something they require and in focusing on it they can move into a wealth mindset. 

The word ‘want’ implies lack whereas ‘require’ is a better word, she advised. 

You’re not thinking about all the benefits of having money

One tool to get over your fear of wealth is to remind yourself of all the good it can do.

‘Make a list of who would benefit from you having more money,’ Marisa said. ‘Whose kids would you put through school? Whose mortgage would you pay off? Who would you help and employ? Make that list as long as you can.

‘Next, write out your scarcity beliefs – that you might get robbed and you won’t make true friends – but ensure that this list is far smaller than the other one.

‘It’s a way to train your brain to see that, for you, having money is good, because other people benefit.

‘The more people benefit from you having wealth, the more likely you are to get it, and still more importantly, to keep it.’

Your Mind, Your Rules by Marisa Peer is published by Flight Books